Sunday, March 27, 2005♥
everything happened so suddenly.. it's been a day since she has passed away... yea she left us while she was asleep at nite.. it's scary how life n death can b so unpredictable.. scary. n it's definitely the first time i saw dad cry..
5:17 PM♥ Saturday, March 26, 2005♥
this has been in my heart for a loong loong time...
wad is friendship actually?
y do i always end up feelin this way?.. am i expecting too much of u?.. mayb i am, or rather i tink i am. y do i always feel tt u're not there when i need somebody?.. y isit tt u can leave a fren's msg unreplied? isit typical of u to not reply them? y y y.. much as i needed the ans, thou shall not ask..bcoz i noe.. i noe our relationship will turn sour. sometimes i feel the connection, sometimes all i get is a cold n empty response.. y? i'm always the one waiting hopefully tt u'd not repeat wad u'd done previously.. leaving me all alone there lik an idiot. y do u always take tings for granted? i feel lik i'm being taken for granted, tt u dun care bout me smtimes.. history'd repeated itself soo many times u noe... n dun tell me until now u still do not understand me, tt i'd wait no matter wad.. bcoz u r my fren, i trust u'd turn up n not leave me there.. but i guess i'm wrong.. how am i supposed to trust u.. tell me. i really feel lik givin up.. but smhow i feel tt there's this smthing there.. smtimes i tink i do not understand u at all, seriously. i dunno wad u r thinkin.. smtimes i juz feel lik im imposing on u u noe.. but frens dun use the word 'impose' on each other rite? maybe it's juz me. the white flag is half raised.
12:17 AM♥ Saturday, March 19, 2005♥
will u juz stoppit?!.. i really cant imagine staying nxt to a person who yells at her maid all the time. it's like she's some empress dowager and the maid is her slave, who is being subjugated to be at her beck and call all the time.. she juz doesnt realise how fortunate she is to have her a maid who serves to her every needs as compared to some other old person who does not have the money to own one and probably has to go out to work even if she's unwell to support herself.. n she treats her like she's dirt or smthng. i wld nva n cannot imagine tt i'm sobbing for her now.. i mean yes that is typical of me who will cry along w tt person who is crying. can hear her pitiful n supposed quiet sobbings from my room.. when she's supposed to be having lunch..
sighz. why is the world lik dat. i mean life is really unfair. i would not b surprised if she chose to run away from this house. really. n the ting is i'm helpless about it. bcoz i have supposedly no authority to even tell her off. if she was my mum, i would have ticked her off for being so nonsensical, irritating, annoying and mean. and to tink that her sons and daughters treat her like she's really the empress dowager. can't stand it. wait till they live w her everyday. i can't wait to expose her of her evil doings. and so much about her being religious n stuff. my god. so now i choose to shut my door so i hear no evil n pray not to see any. sometimes i really understand why daughters-in law choose not to stay with their in-laws. really. n i hope i will not suffer the same way that some r suffering. n if u r wondering who is this i'm talkin about.. juz think. there's only 1 other woman staying in this house apart from my mum. yes that's her. do i sound like some unfilial bitch? i dun care. i'd really feel lik a bitch if i dun expose that ugly side of hers..
12:49 PM♥ Friday, March 11, 2005♥
stop staring ok. urgh.
6:41 PM♥ Sunday, March 06, 2005♥
life of a TV FrEeeek...
mon - 10pm - desperate housewives
tue - rest/ do stuff
wed - 8pm - 1030pm american idol - 1030pm - amazing race
thur - 10pm - american idol - 11pm - bachelor/ upcoming 'chase' starring linda & utt
fri - 10pm - dvd time
sat - 930pm - guess x3
sun - wadeva's on tv
=) yeah, i love my tv.

oh man, i tink this season's american idol's the most competitive. dun tink anyone deserves to b out haha.. i mean, i wont noe who to pick! yea, n i hate the ending for bachelor. y did he choose tt scheming woman?.. tink muz b bcoz she'll fulfill his sexual desires haha.. cant stand tt woman. oh amber n rob make a really good couple.. amber's so pretty..

oh n did i mention anything bout putting more effort in my studies??.... hmm...
12:28 AM♥